Just another Blogatize weblog
Day at the Clarke Circus
Jul 14th
There are some days that seem to flow by and others where I feel like Tim and I are the ringleader in a very dangerous circus. Today was one of those days. The day started out kind of early, Logan’s speech teacher was coming over, and Dylan had his root canal appointment. So Tim brought Dylan to his appointment and I stayed home. I had to stay home because I had a meeting with my boss via phone. See my job is full time and I do it from home, I am a grant writer. Everything that could be going wrong with my job was. The concept paper I had worked on with my boss that was near completion was getting edited left and right by the client, it was crazy. So I was on and off the phone and on the Internet the entire day. I was trying to keep the kids quite while the teacher was here. I was texting back and forth with Tim, it was crazy already and little did I know the day had not even begun. And it was David’s 15th birthday. He was sleeping, he has this knew thing staying up all night playing playstation and sleeping all day, or waking up grouchy.
Logan came in at one point to interupt with something cute. He sat down next to us and said he wanted to be a knight, a knight in shining armor.
I spent most of the afternoon on the phone with my boss. As soon as I got off the phone we were ready to leave to sneak out and run up to Walmart get David’s new bike, we were going to surprise him. Bradley wanted to go. So were were already to go and Bradley can’t access his shoe’s. Apparently, he has mysteriouly locked the door to his room and can’t get in. And somehow the key to his room is inside. It turns out he put an exterior door lock on his bedroom door. So it is getting late and we want David to get a chance to ride his bike today, and now we have to help Bradley. They were trying everything to get in. Tim ended up taking off the molding and picking the lock with a butter knife. So finally we leave and get to Walmart and get the bike as well as a new outfit for him.
So we surprise David with the new bike, he is happy, for David that means a 2 second smile. We tell everyone we are leaving David asks where we are going, we say comeone we are going out to eat to Outback. He didn’t realize we were taking him out to eat. So we tell the waiter it is his birthday and David gets all stressed out and doesn’t want to be sung to so we have to tell the waiter not to sing to him. While at the restaurant we get a text message from Amanda saying that Bradley is a psycho path and that he is fighting with Logan and trying to beat him up. Now can you picture the circus ring number 1 in your mind? Ring 3 we are eating, ring 1 is Bradley chasing Logan and ring 2 is the rest of them chasing each other fighting over I don’t know maybe fish sticks because that is what their meal was for tonight, that was Logan’s choice. As I understand it he was a great Chef, Emily was his assistant.
So we get home and it is dark David wants to ride around for a bit on his bike we make him come in and it is time for cake and ice cream and we have to eat again. Talk about living in a circus act, and talk about being full.
Something else funny I was thinking about today, I and many women seem to have double standards for men and women that act like jerks. Today when we were driving home from the restaurant we were past on a double line, both of us called the guy a dick head, but where I thought about it I had to laugh. I laugh because that does not bother Tim. But now I would never call a female who drives like that a female body part. Let’s think about that for a moment – Hey you stupid vagina head, or worse yet you p word. I could never do it. It is just one of those funny things in life.
Well gotta write an article or two, have a good night, come back again soon.
Michele – aka the Ring leader.
Circus Act
Jul 14th
There are some days that seem to flow by and others where I feel like Tim and I are the ringleader in a very dangerous circus. Today was one of those days. The day started out kind of early, Logan’s speech teacher was coming over, and Dylan had his root canal appointment. So Tim brought Dylan to his appointment and I stayed home. I had to stay home because I had a meeting with my boss via phone. See my job is full time and I do it from home, I am a grant writer. Everything that could be going wrong with my job was. The concept paper I had worked on with my boss that was near completion was getting edited left and right by the client, it was crazy. So I was on and off the phone and on the Internet the entire day. I was trying to keep the kids quite while the teacher was here. I was texting back and forth with Tim, it was crazy already and little did I know the day had not even begun. And it was David’s 15th birthday. He was sleeping, he has this knew thing staying up all night playing playstation and sleeping all day, or waking up grouchy.
Logan came in at one point to interupt with something cute. He sat down next to us and said he wanted to be a knight, a knight in shining armor.
I spent most of the afternoon on the phone with my boss. As soon as I got off the phone we were ready to leave to sneak out and run up to Walmart get David’s new bike, we were going to surprise him. Bradley wanted to go. So were were already to go and Bradley can’t access his shoe’s. Apparently, he has mysteriouly locked the door to his room and can’t get in. And somehow the key to his room is inside. It turns out he put an exterior door lock on his bedroom door. So it is getting late and we want David to get a chance to ride his bike today, and now we have to help Bradley. They were trying everything to get in. Tim ended up taking off the molding and picking the lock with a butter knife. So finally we leave and get to Walmart and get the bike as well as a new outfit for him.
So we surprise David with the new bike, he is happy, for David that means a 2 second smile. We tell everyone we are leaving David asks where we are going, we say comeone we are going out to eat to Outback. He didn’t realize we were taking him out to eat. So we tell the waiter it is his birthday and David gets all stressed out and doesn’t want to be sung to so we have to tell the waiter not to sing to him. While at the restaurant we get a text message from Amanda saying that Bradley is a psycho path and that he is fighting with Logan and trying to beat him up. Now can you picture the circus ring number 1 in your mind? Ring 3 we are eating, ring 1 is Bradley chasing Logan and ring 2 is the rest of them chasing each other fighting over I don’t know maybe fish sticks because that is what their meal was for tonight, that was Logan’s choice. As I understand it he was a great Chef, Emily was his assistant.
So we get home and it is dark David wants to ride around for a bit on his bike we make him come in and it is time for cake and ice cream and we have to eat again. Talk about living in a circus act, and talk about being full.
Viagra Ice Pops on Sale Aisle 10
Jul 11th
We were shopping in our local grocery store filling up our carts, and I thought I heard my husband say the funniest thing. I could have sworn he said “Oh look Viagra ice pops”, I just look at him smiling and said “What?” He was wondering what I was smiling at after all what is there to smile at in a grocery store. We both got a good laugh out of that one.
Remember how I said that 16 year old girls were put on Earth to simply drive their parents mad, well today was another one of those days. Amanda decided that today was her day to age us at least 10 years of course little did she know she would be having tough competition from Bradley and TJ, you know the two oldest that you think would be the best behaved, think again.
TJ decided to hit us with a grand slam last night. He came in looking like he had swallowed a canary, wait maybe more like a hawk. We could tell he wanted to tell us something. Well since he is 20 years old and has a girlfriend, I thought he was going to say something like he wanted to get married or his girlfriend was pregnant, but no instead he told us he wants to join the Air Force. Now keep in mind this is a kid that has no entrance to his room, instead of an entrance there is a trail leading to his bed. He also has a beard and mustache and longish hair. So my first comment in shock was “Are you nuts, do you know what that means?”
Bradley meanwhile, you know still jobless, has sold his I-phone and his pants are on fire, and the money is flying out. He is now selling his computer which is just sold earlier today.So life according to Bradley….. So now that I am unemployed and have $500 in my pocked. Being Bradley and completely irrational like I normally am, I want to buy a surround sound system. I don’t understand why my mom and dad are busting my balls on such a needed item.
So to top off the family today – 16 year old girls simply drive their parents nuts, 20 year olds have no clue about life, and 18 year old males live only in the moment, not even in the next day.
And all 5 year old wants to do is go to the park, every single day. Oh and Logan, as in the 5 year old, also thinks he should have a cell phone.
Queen of Beating Around The Bush
Jul 6th
If there is one thing that I have learned as a parent it is this: That all 16 year old girls are in existence simply to drive their parents mad. And that my daughter Amanda is the master at the technique matter of fact I think she holds classes in her bedroom in secret sessions. I can see it now throngs of girls huddled to hear her every word. Our daughter is a diva and master of deception. She also is a twister of words she is a great creator of the Dad said or Mom said just to try to seal a deal. You the know the deals that would never mass muster had both parents been present.
And my husband thinks I am the Queen of Beating around the Bush. I had to laugh last night when he called me that. We were laying in bed and I realized that the hallway light was on. I said “Now what are we going to do the hallway light is on and I cannot reach it” You know how it is the hallway light is on a pull string, one of those pull strings that has slowly faded away so little ole 5’4 me can no longer reach it. So my husband rolls out of bed and turns off the light. He returns to bed and asks me if I am watching TV which I am. When I am done, I realize that I cannot find the remote. I say “what am I gonna do I don’t know where the remote is to turn off the tv?” My husband gives a groan and says “ You are the queen at beating around the bush why don’t you just ask me to turn off the tv and the light?” Of course my husband is King of the Bush.
So we have a house of royalty to match the indoor pool. Oh did I mention we have Sir Squirrels that come and pay a visit every once in a while we have the perfect answer for. We are establishing a relocation program for squirrels. You see the story is kind of funny. We have a chandelier in the kitchen and one day I come out and I notice a piece of bread near one of the lights. Naturally, I assume that it is David and that he was throwing food. We have him in the kitchen cleaning high and low. Two days later the same thing happens. This time I am really mad, so mad I am ready to put David in a relocation program. Well funny thing, it wasn’t David at all. Next morning I come stumbling into kitchen in an early morning stumble looking for a drink and I come eye to eye with Sir Squirrel, I scream, he screams and we both run. Guess where he was at first, on the chandelier. So we are setting up a trapping system with operation Park Rescue where we are going to trap the squirrels and drop them off at the park. Now if this does not work, it is death row. Sorry you furry tailed friends.
Logan was doing some cleaning today of his closet and he comes out with a bag of his and Brendan’s clothes and he says “Mom, Dad these are your clothes from 1899, and some of mine from when I was 2 from 1990.” OMG talk about funny.
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